[All enter Theater as we return from commercials.]

MARCO: What *were* you going to say, Jake?
JAKE: I, uh... forget.

>
>"YOU GET UP, AND DON'T NOBODY TRY NOTHING!"
>
>THE OTHER LEGIONNAIRES RESTRAINED MIGHTY AND LED HIM OUT OF THE CELL.

RACHEL: Wait a sec! Wasn't he on the wall? And chained as well?
MARCO: That's a big, fat, plot hole, right there.

>
> 
>
> 
>
>WHEN KNUX AND JULIE-SUE

RACHEL: Make up your mind about the spelling of 'Julie-Su'!!

>                        HAD REACHED ECHIDNAOPOLIS, THEY WERE SHOCKED 
>TO SEE
>IT WAS
>NOT EVEN TOUCHED BY THE DARK LEGION. INSTEAD

MARCO: -Mutant Kooshballs took over.

>
>ALL THE CITIZENS WERE WALKING AROUND GETTING ON WITH THEIR LIVES. 
>
>"HMMM THIS IS ODD. I THOUGHT THEY WOULD BE HERE." JULIE SAID. "I
>KNOW....
>WAIT WHAT IS
>THAT STICKING UP FROM THE GROUND? IT LOOKS LIKE A CITY KINDA SIMILAR 
>TO
>ROBOTROPOLIS.

JAKE: [Julie] Oh no! It knocked away my quotation mark!

>"

JAKE: [Julie] Oh, good. There it is.

>
>"C'MON JULIE LETS SNEAK AROUND THE BACK TO INVESTIGATE. WE CAN DO
>
>THIS BE CUTTING THROUGH SANDOPOLIS ZONE.

MARCO: [sarcastic] Yeah! Let's go through the heat and possibly die in the
       desert without food or water...

>                                         KNUCKLES SAID AS HE AND JULIE
>RAN
>
>TOWARDS THE CITY.
>
> 
>
>A HALF IN HOUR LATER THEY WERE ON THE BACK OUTSKIRTS OF THE CITY. THE
>
>PLACE WAS LITERALLY CRAWLING WITH DARK LEGIONNAIRES.
>
>" LET'S GO. JULIE YOU GO TO THE RIGHT AND I'LL TAKE LEFT GOT THAT?" 

JAKE: [Knuckles] Then we step forward towards each other, then dance the
      do-si-do.
RACHEL: Ah, I remember that...

>
>"GOT IT KNUX." SHE SAID AS SHE LEPT INTO THE SHADOWS AND RAN. KNUCKLES
>RAN
>OFF THE
>OTHER WAY NOT KNOWING WHAT WAS IN STORE FOR HIM.
>
> 
>
>"LORD ENERJAK, THE GUARDIAN HAS BEEN SIGHTED IN SECTOR FIVE!" KRAGOK
>SAID AS HE
>BUSTLED IN. 
>
>"GOOD, HAVE YOUR MEN CHASE HIM AND SURROUND HIM AT THE PRISON COMPOUND
>AT SECTOR
>6. NO ONE IS TO SHOOT OR CAPTURE HIM. MAKE SURE HE CRAWLS THROUGH THE
>AIR
>DUCT. ALSO
>MAKE SURE ALL AIR VENTS ARE CLOSED AND SEALED EXCEPT
>
>THE ONE OVER ROOM 212. " ORDERED ENERJACK,
>
>" YES MILORD."

RACHEL: Ah, the lame attempt at Ye Ole English.

>
>"OH AND KRAGOK, IS THE BAIT IN PLACE?"

MARCO: [Enerjak] I'm goin' fishin'.

>
>"YES SIR."
>
>"GOOD YOU MAY CARRY OUT THE PLAN." 
>
>KRAGOK LEFT THE ROOM. ENERJAK WAS IN A VERY GOOD MOOD.

RACHEL: He managed to sue the creators of Leprechauns In Space.

>                                                       HE WAS GOING TO
>
>GET HIS REVENGE ON HIS BROTHER AND ON HIS NEPHEW.

MARCO: Isn't his brother supposed to be dead by now?

>                                                  HE MADE A VERY LOW
>AND
>
>FRIGHTENING CHUCKLE. HE GOT UP AND WENT TO ROOM #212 WERE MIGHTY

RACHEL: "Were Mighty"? Does 00dodger mean "was Mighty" or "where Mighty"?
MARCO: The world may never know...

>
>HAD BEEN CHAINED TIGHTLY AND CRUELLY TO THE WALL. HE EYED THE HELPLESS
>ARMADILLO
>WHO KNEW THAT IF HE WERE TO EVEN MOVE IT WOULD BE THE END OF HIM.

JAKE: That means no breathing, you!

>                                                                  ALL
>THAT
>ENERJAK
>COULD DO NOW WAS WAIT. AND HE WOULD.....
>
> 
>
> 

MARCO: We're *waiting*...

>
> 
>
>KNUCKLES WAS RUNNING. HE WAS DISCOVERED BY LEGIONNAIRES, AND WAS BEING
>CHASED. HE
>HAD TRIED TO GET AWAY BUT EVERYWHERE HE WENT MORE LEGIONNAIRES CAME.

RACHEL: Couldn't he just *glide* away?

>                                                                     
>HE QUICKLY
>DUCKED INTO AN ALLY

JAKE: Why would you want to go into a friend? Wait, wait! Don't answer that!
MARCO: Okay. Fine.

>                    BEHIND A BUILDING. HE LOOKED AROUND AND SAW THE
>LEGION
>CLOSING
>IN. HE TRIED TO FIND AWAY TO GET AWAY. 

MARCO: Is there a way to get away? Sail away, sail away...?

>
>"WHERIS

RACHEL: Is that a whereis feel?

>        ARCHY WHEN YOU NEED HIM." KNUX THOUGHT. SUDDENLY HE SAW AN AIR
>DUCT AND
>HOPPED IN IT AND BEGAN TO CRAWL THROUGH IT. IT SEEMED LIKE HOURS SINCE
>KNUCKLES SAW
>LIGHT.

JAKE: Head towards the light, Knuckles...

>       THE AIR WAS BECOMING HOT AND UNCOMFORTABLY THICK.

RACHEL: As opposed to comfortably hot and thick?
MARCO: Sayyy...
JAKE: Marco, no!

>                                                         FORTUNATELY
>THERE WAS
>AN OPEN VENT UP AHEAD. KNUCKLES CRAWLED UP TO IT AND PUT HIS FACE ON
>IT. IT
>WAS RELIEF
>BUT ONLY FOR A MOMENT. HE LOOKED DOWNAND

JAKE: Does the author have a broken spacebar or what?
RACHEL: Not to mention a broken capslock key...

>                                         SAW ENERJAK AND KRAGOK
>QUESTIONING A
>TERRIFIED MIGHTY.

MARCO: Isn't Mighty supposed to be brave or something?
JAKE: The name 'Mighty' would imply that he wasn't a wuss...

>                  KNUCKLES COULD NOT BELIEVE THAT ENERJAK WAS FREE AND
>HE KNEW
>THAT ENERJAK WAS GOING TO DO SOMETHING TO MIGHTY IF HE COULD NOT GET
>ANY
>INFORMATION
>
>OUT OF HIM.

RACHEL: He would put on tapes of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood...

>            HE QUIETLY BEGAN TO LOOSEN THE GRATING OVER THE VENT IN
>ORDER TO
>STRIKE....

JAKE: ...and get Mighty killed.

>
> 
>
>MIGHTY GULPED AS KRAGOK REPEATED THE QUESTION.
>
>"WHERE IS YOUR GUARDIAN?" 

MARCO: [Mighty] Up there in that vent.
JAKE: [Knuckles] D'oh! Mighty!

>
>MIGHTY GAVE HIS MOST SEMI-TRUTHFUL ANSWER. "I...I DON'T KNOW."
>
>MIGHTY SENSED SOMETHING WAS WRONG ABOUT HIS WHOLE SCENE. IT WAS LIKE
>
>EVERYBODY WAS WAITING FOR SOMETHING . 

JAKE: Yeah. For an actual answer.

>
>"KRAGOK, IT LOOKS LIKE OUR GUEST NEEDS TO BE PERSUADED." ENERJACK SAID
>AS HE
>REACHED
>FOR A BLACK BOX AND PULLED OUT WHAT LOOKED LIKE A HAND CHIME WITH A
>LITTLE
>KNOB ON
>IT. ENERJACK TURNED THE KNOB A LITTLE AND SPOKE TO MIGHTY.
>
>"THIS HERE ARMADILLO, IS ONE OF MY MANY INVENTIONS.

RACHEL: It's a small door. So?

>                                                    I DESIGNED IT FOR
>THE
>EST. THIS LITTLE
>THING IS ADJUSTED TO THE RIGHT PITCH OF THE RELUCTANT SUSPECT'S
>HEARING,
>DEPENDING ON
>WHAT SPECIES IT WAS AND IT WAS GIVEN A WHACK FROM THE MALLE ATTACHED,
>AND A
>SHARP
>PITCH IS ADMINISTERED THAT ONLY THE ANIMAL CAN HEAR."

MARCO: So it's a new doggy whistle?

>                                                     ENERNJACK
>EXPLAINED. THEN
>WITH A FLICK OF THE WRIST HE PLAYED A SINGLE NOTE HELD IT UP TO
>MIGHTY'S
>EAR. MIGHTY'S
>FACE BECAME A TWISTED EXPRESSION OF PAIN AS THE SOUND RIPPED THROUGH
>HIS
>BRAIN.

JAKE: Enough to make his brain explode.
MARCO: The end.
RACHEL: We all wish.

>       HE
>PULLED AT HIS CHAINS WEAKLY IN ORDER TO GET AWAY FROM THE SOUND.

RACHEL: Isn't he, like, supposed to be mighty?

>                                                                
>ENERJAK MUFFLED
>THE CHIME AND SAID "WEHERE

JAKE: Big, fat, juicy typo number...hey, I lost count.

>                           IS THE GUARDIAN."
>
>MIGHTY HESITATED BUT FINALLY SAID

MARCO: Ooky zing gleek fwoomp.

>                                  " I TRUTHFULLY DO NOT KNOW. AND IF I
>DID I
>WOULD'NT
>TELL YOU."
>
>ENERJACK SNEERED AT MIGHTY. "LETS JUST SEE HOW TRUTHFUL YOU ARE AFTER
>YOU GO
>WITHOUT FOOD OR WATER UNTIL YOU DECIDE TO TALK!!" THEN HE STORMED OUT.
>MIGHTY HUNG
>HIS HEAD

RACHEL: Snapping off his frigging neck!
MARCO: Calm down, Rachel, there's still quite a way to go.

>         AND SAW THE GUARDS LIFT THEIR STUN RAYS UP TOWARD AN OPEN
>GRATE IN THE
>CEILING. THEN HIS MIND CLICKED ....

JAKE: "I've got it...I'll mix grapefruit juice with orange soda to make a
      tangy drink! I'm a genius!"

>                                    THIS WAS ALL A SETUP! HE KNEW
>EXACTLY
>WHO HAD TO BE
>UP THERE....

MARCO: Grandma!

>            KNUCKLES! 
>
>"KNUCKLES GET OUT OF HERE ITS A TRAP!!"

RACHEL: Leave the trap alo-- aw, forget it.

>
>BUT IT WAS TO LATE

MARCO: [Singing quietly to himself] I'll take my time 'cause I know you'll
       be late...

>                   THE GUARDS FIRED AND A LIMP FORM CAME THROUGH THE
>GRATE
>
>....KNUCKLES WAS

RACHEL: Lazy.
JAKE: Stupid.
MARCO: Weird.

>                 CAPTURED.

ALL: That too.

>                           THE GUARDS QUICKLY RESTRAINED HIM. KRAGOK
>QUICKLY
>SHOUTED ORDERS

JAKE: Get me large fries! And a hamburger to go!
RACHEL: Speaking of go, we should.

[All leave]

[Commercials]

[Room]

[The trio of MSTers walk in, tired from their riffing.]

MARCO: I told you that we'd lose it someday! And this is it!
RACHEL: C'mon, guys, we aren't going to let the Yeerks win, are we?
JAKE: [Looks as though he's going to say something supportive] PORKRINDS!
	[Starts to run around the room, insanely] AHAHAHAHA! PORKRINDS! Woob 
      woob woob!
RACHEL: Jake! Calm down! [Grabs ahold of Jake]
MARCO: Jake, buddy-boy! My man! Get ahold of yourself!
JAKE:[hopefully] Porkrinds?
RACHEL: No.
JAKE: Porkrinds.
RACHEL: No. Jake, c'mon. Don't snap on us now.
JAKE:[blinks] Um... sorry. I got carried away.
MARCO: Sure did.
RACHEL: Anyway, about this fanfic... is it just me or does 00dodger have
        the caps lock button stuck on?
JAKE: Or she likes to make them shout a lot.
MARCO: How about a spell checker? Does she have a spell checker?
RACHEL: Doesn't seem like it.
MARCO: I love this poem that I read once:
	 I have a spelling checker,
       It came with my PC.
       It planely marks four my revue
       Misteaks I can knot sea.
       I've run this poem thru it.
       I'm sure your pleased to no
       Its letter-perfect in it's weigh,
       My checker tolled me sew.
JAKE: Where'd that come from?
MARCO: Just this guy call Shay Car--

[Commercial Sign Light Flashes]

JAKE:-We'll be right back.
MARCO: That wasn't his last name!

[Commercials]