Newsgroups: alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog From: zuckuss199@aol.com (Zuckuss199) Date: 1998/07/12 Subject: [cheaply MSTed]FANFIC: Sonic Fights Robotnik 3: Too Fast For The Naked Eye >Except >for Packbell, Chris Petrucci and Vision, and others they >are copyrights of their respective authors. HOWEVER THEY >DO NOT APPEAR IN THIS STORY Then..? >SONIC FIGHTS ROBOTNIK 3 >Too Fast for The Naked Eye >By SONIC FAN >Another SWAT smashing action paked story from the master >of sonic fan fiction!!! hahahahahahahaha-no.>It was another day in Knothole not being without the >worry of Dr. Ivo Robontik Meaning they are not not worried (Dailiy Show reference) >All the freedom fighters were >doing useful stuuff. Sally was orgazining the computor >records she was doing WHAT to the computer records?! >ROtor was dunking donuts in the lab. Usefullness..? >Meanwhile while >this stuff was being done Sonic was in his hut watching >TV. Then Tails walked in. >"Hi there Tails have a Mountain Due" said Sonic >"thanks sonic hey whats on TV." Sonic: none of your business you little freak get out of my house >"Everything on tv sucks thanks to robotnik. Since the TV >station is still down the only thing to watch is >robotniks channel" said sonic If that channel sucks why watch it? >{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Just then Rotor suddenly spilled coffee on the >cybersuit. >"oops" he said Nelson: Ha Ha! Cybersuit..is that what you use for Cyber sex? >Sonic is watching TV. >Robotnik: Doo doo doo this is the robotnik channel and >it's time for the Robotnik show! >Snively and the SWAT bot orchastra play the Robotnik >Show theme song. Snively plays the sax. A sax in an orchestra... really.. >Robotnik: Helloo! Wlecome to the show! Live from >Robotnropolis! So freedom fighters are like, lame. >SWAT bots: HA......HA.........HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT IS SO FUNNY!!!!! since when did Robotnik become a like, surfer and junk? >"Boo!" say sonic and Tails >Robotnik: We'll be right back after this commercial. Doo >doo doo doo doo dooo. Hello. Are you robotocizd? If not >there are people who can help. Just stop by robotropolis >and we'll robotocize you good. No, I'd like some Carbon Freezing instead so I can find out if it really does make me blind when I'm released. >Doo doo doo I'm Dr. Ivo >Robotnik doo doo doo I'm a singin' my song because we're >back ooh doo doo doo doo. >Robotnik: Today our guest is Ken Penders. Ok, Sonic Fan enough with Penders >Snively and the swats play music while Ken walks onstage >Robtnik: Hiya Ken! >Ken: Hello Mr. Docotor HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (sorry still laughing at that FF's are lame joke!!) >Robotnik: Please, call me Ivo >Ken: ok Evo >Robotnik: IVO! >Ken: Ok FatO >Robotnik: Fok!!! just forget it! Fok: Forgotten, sir. >Ken: Otay >Robotnik: So Ken what do you do for a job >Ken: Well I draw Sonic comics >Robotnik: really >Ken: because I hate sonic ok then..>Robotnik: Really? ME TOO!!! >Ken: And I want to kill Sally! >RobotniK: Really? ME TOO!!! >Ken: Mmm-hmmm thats right a-yup >Robotnik: So if you draw sonic comics.... >Ken: ya >Robotnik: and you hate sonic... >Ken: ya >Robotnik: Wouldn't that be kind of a.....Walking >Contradiction? Ken: Well yes it would Jelly Belly >Ken: In what way >Robotnik: Snively, wouldn't you agree that's it's a >walking contradiction >Snively: Well...uuhhh...I.... >Robotnik: JUST SAY YES!!!! Snively: NO!! You've taunted me long enough you meanie!!! :::Snively punches Ivo::: Robotnik: Hehehehehehe STOP IT! >Snivley: Um, ok, er um, ah, yes >Robotnik pulls out and electric guitar and snively plays >the bass some SWAT bot plays drums Ok then... >They play Walking Contradiction by Greenday NO MORE GREENDAY THEY SUCK >Robotnik: DUNN DUUNN DUNNN WALKING CONTRADICTION!!! >Sonic says "Well that wasted some time. I wonder what >Roter is up to" >JUST THEN ROTOR FALLS THROUGH THE ROOF OF THE HUT!!! Rotor: Sorry that last doughnut was really saturated with gas Sonic: Meaning? Rotor: I farted >Rotor "Sonic Its' an emergency!!!" >"What is it? Another SWAT missel?" says Sonic Rotor: NO!! There's a wrench stuck up my butt!!! >"No!" said Rotor "Geoffry St. George is putting the >moves on Sally!" >"Ye gads!" said sonic "I'll be right out there kicking >his butt in a few minutes!" Geoffrey: AAAAAAAAH Sonic: I WILL KCI YOUR BUTT Geoffrey: No you wont SOnic: Yes I will Geoffrey: No you wont Sonic: Yes I will >"Hey sonic" mentioned Tails "Did you ever think that our >lives are like TV shows sometimes" Sonic: Yeah and it has my name on it!! TAH-DAH!!! :::shows off the logo::: >"Uhh whaddya mean?" sonic said Tails: Oh, go F*ck yourself!! (MAD TV reference) >"Well you know sometimes we do stuff and it's like the >stuff on Tv and stuff" tails said >"Tails shut up. I don't know what the fock you're >talking about our life being tv or something now I gotta >JUICE!" Tails: Can I have some!! Sonic: No, Tails thats disgusting >sonic said then he ran out of the hut WHOOOOSH! Whoooosh the Hutt and his lackeys Stuuff, Boushh nd Wooof >{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Knothole Villiage >SCRREEEEECHCHHHH!!! CRRAAAASSSHHHHH!! Sonic spontaneously conbusted (sp?) >sonic runs into a hut >"Ahhh Sally you are like the most beutiful apple" >Geoffry said Geoffrey: With a worm in it!! >"You are so flattery" said Sally >Sonic climbed out of the junk pile So he's hitting on her at a junk yard? Sonic: Hey whats worse than fining a worm in your apple? Geoffrey: Finding half a worm thats not funny!! >"Hold it G! Get your hands off her you dam dirty ape!" in his spare time, Geoffrey dresses like an ape and rolls around in dirt near beaver dams. >sonic spat >"Oh well look at this. If it isn't the villiage >buffooon. Whoooosh the Hutt and his lackeys Boushh, Stuuff and Wooof just captured buffooon.>." Geoffrey said "How are you today villiage >buffoon? Felling stupid i thought so fa-ha ha ha" Sonic: I didnt say anything >"SHUT UP!!!" sonic said >"Oh touche, Sono. I am great, you are not, end of story" >Geoff said This really doesnt sound like Geoffrey, more like Max Acorn >"Oh yeah, well let's just figt about it, buttmunch." is Sonicfan forever stuck in the Beavis and Butthead era or what? >sonic said >"Well ok we shall du-el for the love of fair lady >princess sally" Sally: Screw you . I've got a date with king Acorn!! Sonic and Geoffrey: OH NASTY!!! they both figure they dsont want her anymore and run Sally: Ok, their gone, you can come out computer records!! Sally begins "orgazinizing" the computer records >Geoff said "In a gentlemanly fashion of >course. And of couse I will wi-" >Just then Sonic turned into a spin blade and cut Geoffry >in half! Geoffrey: Cheater!!! I'm telling!! >"Oh my God! They killed Geoffrey!" said Rotor >"YOU BASTARDS!" said Tails Sonic: AAAH!!!Go away i was about to make sweet love to Sally!! Sonic sings a Chef song.. >{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >5 min. later >"Hey rotor" said Sonic "How's my cybersuit? Is the tune- >up done?" BEcause I need it or else the cybersex wont count!!! >Rotor said "Er, well I kind of spilled coffee on it so I >had to clean it. And instead of using Polymethalene >cleanser i used Polyzethelene cleanser" huh? >"And that means..." said sonic, tapping his foot >"It don't work no more" said Rotor Sonic slaps him for his use of bad grammer >"Oh well that's just not good. What will we do now. Do >you know how to fix it robor?" Rotor: stop calling em that!!! >"Hell no" said Rotor >"Well this is just peachee" sonic said Peachee is Whoooosh the hutt's newest guard. >"Hey sonic my Uncle Bob used to have a cybersuit I bet >he can fix yours!" said Tails Terminator: Uncle Bob? >"Way past cool bro!" said sonic "Where does he live?" oops, I just remembered I shot him!! >"Like, on the other side of mobius" tails replied >"FOCK!" Fock: What do you want?! >said sonic "Well I guess we have to go there" David: No you dont Austin: Yes he does Jose: Hey I thought I got rid of you !! >"Hey Sal" said Sonic "Me an Tails are going to find Bob >Prower" David: Bob Prower is actually Bob Dole in hiding Austin: Hiding from his past as a Prosti- David: Austin, no!>SAlly said "Can you stop by the mall and pick up some >stuff" SAlly is Sally's evil clone!! Dont trust her Sonic!! >"Stuff? well ok." sonic said Austin: (In Sonic voice) I guess the condo- David: Austin no!! >Sally gave sonic the shopping list. Then she moved close >to him and said >"Hey thanks for killing Geoffry St. George he was a real >dumbass. David: Austin, stop that!! Austin: Stoff Watt?! David: Austin no!!! David proceeds to kick Austin's ass Austin: OW! AAAH! OW! OW THAT HURTS!! >he kept like saying stupid stuff to me and >stuff." Sonic: So do I!! Sally: Then commit suicide..for me.. Sonic: ok...::Sonic kills himself::: >"No prob Sal" said Sonic "I'm always glad to kill Geoff" So it happens every week "Next time on Sonic Park- Robotnik Takes over Tails goes into puberty and Geoffrey DIES" >"Well like, get going now or something" said sally David: SonicFan's version of them doesnt sound right Jamie: It's not like something I'd say and stuff David: No comment >"Ya ya hey tails get the hoverbikes!" sonic said Greed o doesn't like you stealing his Hoverbikes!! Oota Goota Sonic? Sonic: Yeah..to the store >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >Mobius Garage less than 1 minute later >"Wow y'all they all is osme hoverbikes isn that a right >Antony?" Bunnie said >"Zee is le ooh la ola of zee bike hoovaire izznt ze >Sonique?" Antoinne said David: What?! >Bunnie says "Y'all got th' sprokets in em. sprok'ts is David: Ok, this is getting really f*cked up... >funny ya'll know some of em are round and some of em are >sqaure hecka y'all all ought'a know some of em arent >even sprokets at all!" Jamie: Ditz >"Oui oui ze spookets is ze mose importante part ov ze >Hoo-veir-siay-coule" antoinne said Austin: Haiki les goika no ma-les screwhappi David: Austin stopo that >"Yeah I'll keep that in mind or something" sonic said >*they're stupid* sonic thought to himself David: Sonic's gained slight intelligence Scott: 3.5 IQ David: Where'd you come from Scott: my house. I've been here the whole time. David..ok... >"Juciy peanut butter an jam on the hoverbikes ????????????!!!!!!!! >HEY HO Jamie: WHAT DID HE CALL ME?! >LETS GO" said Tails revving the engine of his bike >Sonic jumped on a bike and started it. >KRAKA KRAKA BADOOOM! Badooom dances for the pleasure of Whoooosh the Hutt and his lackeys Boushh, Wooof and Stuuff. Buffooon watches from his cell >The engines of both bikes blow up >"Oh ya'll suga" said Bunnie "I was a try'hin to fix tha >old ther old bikes but some of em was bolts and some of >em was screws and some of em was sprokets. Heck all >y'all some em weren't even things at all!" Jamie: Ditz >"Ah oui i say BOONIE pass me ze sPoRokEt and she passe >me une sproket when i want UNE SPROOKATE! UNE SPROOKATE! >ise zat zo ard to oonderstande?" ???????!!!! >Antoinne said >"ok Tails, plan B. This sucks." sonic said >"Plan C, we walk, or in our case run and fly really >fast" sonic continued >So SOnic and Tails ran off into the sunset going in the >general direction of the Mobius Mall >{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Robotropolis, the Death Egg David: The Death Egg was destroyed wehn Sonic fired the proton torpedoes down the exhaust port . Scott. That was the Death STAR >"Mwahahahaha" said Robotnik "I own the only TV station >on Mobius now they have to watch MY SHOWS! >HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" David: Oooh..now he can control the universe!! >Grounder and Scratch were in front of the TV camera >Grounder shoots scratch with a laser gun >"Huhuhuhuhuh" said Grounder >"Heheheheheh" says Scratch. Then scratch beats grounder >with a computer terminal Austin: Thsi reminds me..what was Sally doing to the computer ecords? David: dont tell him. Scott: Ok >"You idiots!" Robotnik said "Cut that out! Why don't you >do something useful, like kill people at the mall or >something" Jamie:Coincidence? I think not >"Cool" said grounder >"Heh heh heh heh yeah!" said scratch "cool!" >"Uhhh sir" said Snively, walking into the room >Robotnik walks in front of the TV camera and says >"Hello, I would like to make a public service >announcement. Snively is dumb. Thank you." Austin: Snively is also gay David: Dammit Austin :::punches Austin::: >Everybody laughs except for snively who mutters "Ugly >old robofat" >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Mobius Mall David: Has been destroyed >"let's see what we're supposed to get" sonic said, >looking at the list "Hmmm a dress, I guess we don't need >to get that since Geoffry is dead" >"Hey sonic wanna spend all the money at the arcade?" >said Tails >"Yeah" said sonic "Good idea, i hate shopping" Scott: really... you know Arcade games work because a small computer is installed itno a large box-like structure with a screen and controls which David: Scott no one cares >Scratch and Grounder are hiding behind a plant >"Hehehheh" said Scratch "Were we supposed to get like, >apples or something" >"No Buttwad" said Grounder as he loaded his grenade >launcher "we have to kill people and stuff" >{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >Arcade Has been destroyed >Tails is playing pinball >Sonic sees the pinball machine and has a flashback >"AHHHHHH!!! NO! NOT PINBALL!" he screams and then falls >on the floor. On the way down he knocks over a few >arcade machines Jamie: Lets review here: He gets a bad memory and falls causing a few arcade machines to fall? Austin: Shutup I liked it David: Austin you like Teletubbies Austin: SO?! >{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}} >Internet Cafe >Sonic is reading the newsgroups and drinking a cafe >late. >alt.fan.sally-acorn >"Here's a message from Geoffry St. George" ??! A new character..? >From: stgeorge@knothole.com >Message Title: Hello Sally >Hello Sally I love you. What say we have some cybersex. David: Hey thats what those cybersuits are for!! >"Arg! I'll kill him!" says Sonic >Sonic goes back to the arcade to check on Tails Scott: I thought he fell over Austin:>{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}} >Grounder and Scratch walk into the arcade both are >heavily armed. Austin: My arms are havy >Then sonic walks in "Yo tails what up?" >Grounder drones "Hegehog Priority 1 or something!" >"Heheh heh heh heh DIE!!!!" says Scratch >Sonic and Tails duck behind A pac man machine. Grounder >fires grenades at it blowing it up. Austin: DAMMIT!!! I WAS GOING TO PLAY THAT!!! >Sonic runs and leaps >onto antoehr machine. Scratch fires the machine gun all >over the place. >Tails jumps on grounder and pulls his nose out and lets >it snap back >"Ow! huh huh!" said grounder "You die infeldel >Kitasune!" Austin: David, what does that mean? David: I dunno evyone looks to Scott Scott: What? >Tails gets hit by grounders drill missle! >"ack i'm bleeding!" said Tails >Sonic spin dashes through an arcade machine and smashes >into scratch. Snic steals his gun and puts it to >Scratches head and pulls the trigger! KABLAMO!!! Sonci: Aww, man how am i going to get those oil stains out? Austin: Use...Cu- David: Thats it!! David pulls out a Bazooka and blows Austin's head off >"heh heh me dead" said Scratch >Grounder fires moregrenades. They miss sonic but blow up >arcade machines. Sonic gets hit in the head with a stray >joystick. He gets knocked down. Grounder rolls over to >him. Grounder: Hey, hows about we.. David: Oh god they've turned into Austin!!! Sonic; HAHAHAHAHA >Then the voice from Furry Mortal Kombat III says "Finish >Him" sonic pulls out a power ring and dashes grounder >blowing him up into a kazillion peices. >"Game Over for them" said sonic >Sonic and Tails leave the mall but before they do they >get some food from Furry McDonald's and steal TP from >the bathrooms and TP the guy working a Furry Radio >Shack. David: Whats TP? Oh Toilet Paper Austin: I am Cornholio!! David: Oh you're alive. Just don't do anything stupid. >{{{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Sonic and Tails trek accross Mobius to find Bob Prower. >They have many exciting adventures but eventually they >reach a town. David: WOW!! SUCH DETAIL!! Jamie: Mach may sue for that >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >6 months after they left Knothole Sonic and Tails arrive >at the town where Tails used to live >"I used to live here you know" said Tails Sonic: Well you're going to die here, you know. Convenient? >"Bob's Trailer >is just over there....." >Just then a robot moves towards them. Followed by a spy >eye. >They spy eye has robotnik's face on the screen. >"HELLOOOOOO!" says Robotnik HELLOOOOOOOO is Whoooosh the Hutt's answer to the Rancor >"Yo Tubbanik I've seen enough of you on TV already" >sonic says >"Hah hah shut up Sonic. You see, I followed you here so >you could meet my newest bot. Meet TANK BOT mark II" David; He got that from Earthbound >Robotnik said >The robot comes into view. It's Tank Bot only bigger, >better and more heavily armed Jamie: But is it faster? >"BEEP BEEP KILL FREEDOM FIGHTERS ARRR BEEP BEEP BEEP" >says the bot >"Ok" says Sonic "Tails......run" >Tank Bot chases after sonic. It runs at Sonic's speed Jamie: Not again.. >sonic can hardly dodge all the lasers and missles flying >at him. Sonic runs up a wall. *this alwaysworks* he >thinks >But Tank Bot II doesn't fall for that trick! It fires a >missle at sonic which missle the blue blure by only an >inch. Sonic is running around Tails is flying around. David: Their drunk like I was Jamie: Dont remind me of last night Scott: What happened last night..? David and Jamie: umm... >Then Tails catches a missle and throws it at the bot. >YOWZA! KABLAMO! TANK BOT 2 EXPOLDES! >"Another day another tank bot dead" said sonic >"we don't kill tank bot every day you know" said Tails >"Ya ya ya what" said sonic >The cameraman tells them to go to the next scene David: The Cameraman suddenly blows up!! Scott: No, seriously what ahppended last night? Austin:>{{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Tails knocks on the door "Hey uncle Bob we need your >help!" >Bob opens the door carrying a triple-barrel shotgun >"Come in ye, Welcome to my trailer" >"hi there" says Sonic "Are you like, Bob Marley" >"No" said Bob "Knuckles is like Bob Marley" >"You've never met him though" said sonic >"The author told me" said Bob David: I am your father Jamie: The alcohol is still affecting you? Scott: Come on, guys just tell me!! >"Yo what up" I said David: Who's I? Austin: I am I. >"Hey author" said sonic >"Hey how's it going" I said >"Past cool" said sonic >"See you later" I said >"Jam past cool alligator" said sonic Austin: They mentoned Edgar. Scott: JUST TELL ME!!!! >"Now getting back to the plot" says sonic "What do you >do around here" >"I make bombs" said Bob >"He used to be in the furry IRA" said Tails David: I'm a furry. Austin: Im not really furry but I think I count Jamie: Im furry Scott: I'm furry now JUST TELL ME WHAT HAPPENDED LAST NIGHT!!! >"That could be useful we could use bombs" said sonic >"But" sonic said "What we need you for right now is to >fix the cybersuit" >"Yeah" said Tails "And fix our TV station too! You can >do that right Bob?" >"Fock ye" said Bob "I'm not some fixing Jamie: That means "Fuck you" in olde English >machine" >"We got lotsa chili Dogs" said sonic >"And hotdogs on a stick?" said Bob >"Yeh" said sonic >"Well I'll do it then" Bob said Austin: I'd do it if he bought me a Po doll David: Who's Po? Austin: My favorite Teletubbie David: Oh god... >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}} >6 months later they all arrive back at Knothole. That >would mean they were gone for about a year. >"Sally, meet my uncle Bob Prower. Can he be a freedom >fighter?" Tails asked Sally >"Well, I dunno, he's kind of ugly" said sally Jamie: PREJEDICE!!!! >Just then a bullet swishes past Sally's head! Ken >Penders is at the top of the clock tower shooting at >Sally! Bob pulls out his shotgun and shoots ken Penders. >BLAM! "EYAH!" Ken falls off the tower >*thud* >"Hello chaps! Jolly good day isn't it!" said >Just then a bullet swishes past Sally's head! Ken >Penders is at the top of the clock tower shooting at >Sally! Bob pulls out his shotgun and shoots ken Penders. >BLAM! "EYAH!" Ken falls off the tower >*thud* >"Hello chaps! Jolly good day isn't it!" said >Just then a bullet swishes past Sally's head! Ken >Penders is at the top of the clock tower shooting at >Sally! Bob pulls out his shotgun and shoots ken Penders. >BLAM! "EYAH!" Ken falls off the tower >*thud* >"Hello chaps! Jolly good day isn't it!" said David: Hey Scott, why did it quote 3 times? Scott: I'll ell you if you tell me what happened last night >Geoffry St. >George >Bob shoots Geoffry right in the left eye, the bullet >goes throgh his head and hits the bulllseye on a swatbot >target >"Oh my God, they killed Geoffry!" said Rotor >"YOU BASTARDS!" said Tails David: Again? Jose: You weren't around the first time David: What kind of a name is Jose? Austin: Whore-Se Jose punches Austin >"But you see Sally" Tails continued "He's useful!" >"Well alright he can stay" Sally said >"Gee thanks bit--" bob said >"UNCLE BOB!!!" said Tails >"But he'd better learn some manners" said Sally "Or >he'll end up like PEZ boy did in the last story cuz I'll >shove a power ring down his throat!" David: Pez tastes like crap!! Jamie: I like it Austin: The dipnsoador is pretty cool David: Dispenser, Austin Austin: Whatever >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}} >Rotor's Lab >Bob fineshed fixing the cybersuit. Sonic Tails and Rotor >watched TV. >Robotnik: Doo doo doo It's The Robotnik With A Bucket on >His Head and Snivley With a Mop on his Head Show! Hello Jamie: I dont get it >I'm Robotnik and I have a bucket on my head! doo doo doo >bucket head doo doo doo doo doo Oh look here's Snively! >Say Hi snively! >Snivley:Er, yes, um I am Snivley. And I have a mop on my >head....a-doo doo doo...doo >Robotnik: Weeee-ha! woo woo woo! on his head> Austin: Robotnik's gayDavid: Austin, for the first time since I met you 12 years ago i agree Jose: That makes me think.. If you 2 hate each other why are you freinds David: He's pretty cool sometimes I guess... Jamie: Yeah but he's too nosy Austin: Oh what ahppened last night? That was cool Scott: Oh,Austin's in on this too? You can tell a braindead Armadillo but not ME?! >Bob shot the TV. "Buncha idyuts" he said >"Hey I was watchin' that!" said Sonic >But Bob had already left Jamie:Bob's pretty smart >{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >10 seconds later >"All right Tails" said Sonic "Where would Bob have >gone?" >"Well If i know my uncle, and I do know my uncle, I say >if he hated that show he was going to kill the cast of >it namely Snivley and Robotnik" Tails said >"He'll be robotocized!" said SOnic "Let's get the other >freedom fighters and go save him!" David: Why are they saving him? Jamie: To fix the Cybersuit Davd:iWhy do they need a cybersuit? Austin: To have cybersex >{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}} >Robotropolis, Death Egg >After many action packed suspenseful battles the freedom >fighter ended up in Robotnik's bathroom. All 3 (except Scott): Umm.. Scott: Well, yeah after many battle it's only natural to have to use the bathroom. >"Ok gang" said Sally "Here's the plan. This is Big-Fat- >Chubby-nik's personal bathroom so the control room is >nearby. So we go there." Jamie: His bathroom IS the control room. Austin: Thats what he does when he's taking a dump >But as luck would have it robotnik walked in. >"Oh what's this" said Robotnik "Freedom Fighters in my >bathroom. Well what a good way to test my new invention! >Oh MARIO-bot!" David: Why is Mario-Bot in his bathroom? >clang clang clang >"Hey Pizanos I am-a Super MArio Bot!" said MARIObot >"MArio, Kill them" Robotnik said >"I do-a whata you-a tella me to do-a cause a-you the big >liguine" MAriobot said >MARIObot shoved all the freedom fighters, with the lone >exception of Sonic, into the large toilet. They wouldn't >flush so mario had to shove them down the toilet with >his plunger. Down they went into the septic >tank. David: Im not sure but I think the sceptic tank is he little tank at the top of the toilet >Then Sonic, wearing the cybersuit, stomped on Mariobot's >head, crushing him. >"What a walking contradiction!" Robotnik said >He then proceeded to sing walking contradiction by >Greenday >After that some SWATbots took sonic prisoner and took >him to the control room David: They succeeded!! Austin:>{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}} >Robotropolis septic tank >"Eww this stinks" said Rotor >"Ah oui es ees STEEEEEENNNNNNKKKKKKKKAAAAYYYYYYY" >Antoinne anoyyingly said "PA-HEW-PHEEEWWW-AHEEEWWWWWW-- >"SHUTUP!" said Sally >"Well wouldya all look at that what I found in the doody >it's Geoffry St. George's dead body!" said Jamie: Ok, what was the point of Geoffrey St. George? >Bunnie >"Oh my God! They already killed Geoffry!" said Rotor >"THOSE BASTARDS!" said Tails >"Heh, I gave him a grave at sea or something" smiled >sally "You know like you do with dead fish, flush them >or something, well he smelled like fish, anyways, i'll >just stop talking because i found a way out, a way out >well lets go then shall we come on i don't have all day David: Sally's being a b*tch >hup two three four lets go march march...." Austin: Hump WHAT?! David; It's HUT 2 3 4 >Death Egg control room >Robotnik: Ha hah....welcome to the Sonic Gets Killed >Show, the show where sonic gets killed. I'm your host >Ivo Robotnik. > >Sonic is tied to a SWAT missle >"Wow I haven't seen one of these in a while" Sonic said >Robotnik: And here is the suit that I confiscated from >the hedgehog. Woo, classy suit. David; For a more civilised age Scott: Stop plagerizing Star Wars >Who are you the suitman. >Well looke here It's suithog sonic. Always wering a >suit, what no tie don't make me laugh! ha...ha.....HA! >Bob Prower blasts down the door with his shotgun! David: Ooh... >Sonic: Bob! >Bob shoots robotnik in the metal arm >Robotnik: Ow! ARRRGgg!!! Scott: I dnt think he'd feel that >Bob frees Sonic >Robotnik turns his arm into a gun and shoots at them >Robotnik: Snivley Grounder Scratch KILL THAT HEDGEHOG >AND THAT FOX!!!! >Grounder: Huh >BLAM >Grounder: uuhhhhh >Scratch: Heh heh Sonic: I thought Scratch and Grounder died David: GO away >Bob shoots the bomb >KABLAM >Scratch: heh dead >Snivley: Um, I'll just be going now >Bob shoots Snivley, Snivley goes flying thorugh a glass >window and falls down from the top of the death egg >*splat* >Sonic: It's wheel of fortune! I'm Pat Sajack the >hedgehog and the category is DEAD FAT GUYS! David: What is Teddy Rooselvetl? Austin: A Fag David: That was the answer Austin: I know David: No, "What is Teddy Roosevelt?" is the answer Austin: I'm confused.. >I'd like to >buy an R for YOU BUTTNIK! >Sonic spins >Robotnik dodges and shoots sonic >Sonic: BR-GAAAK! oof >Bob: That ain't nice >Bob shoots Robotnik >Robotnik: Ow....I'm dead! no! David: I'm dead too >The rest of the freedom fighters arrive >"Hey we're on TV!" said Sonic >"Hi Mom!" said Rotor Austin: Rotor's mom cant hear him shes too busy being a whore Everyone snickers >"Uhh rotor your Mom's robotocized" said Austin: RoboWhore David: (still luaghing a bit) Ok, AUstin, thtas enough.. >Sonic >"waah" said Rotor >"Oh by the way" said Bob "We better skeedaddle cuz I put >a penny in the reactor core as a joke and it's gonna >essplode any time now" >KKKKAAAAAABBOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM!!!! ROBOTROPOLIS BLOWS UP! >Luckily Sonic and the Freedom Fighters escaped with time >to spare. Jmie: They should give more detail David: There's enough deatil!! Austin:>{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}}} >Mobius TV Station >Bob is fixing the TV antenna >"hey stupid" bob said to tails "pass me a hammer" >Tails threw a hammer at Bob. Austin: Tails is Stupid >BoNk! "Ouch!" said bob as the hammer hit him in the >head. Then the antenna fell over. >"That's the third time today" said Sonic >"Get this offa me ya lazy git" said Bob trapped under >the antenna. David: an ANtenna's to heavy for him >Tails helped him get out. >"Oh sonic" said Sally "I read your email and, you >know......" > cybersex? :) > Oh sonic ;) Jamie: This reminds me of last night Scott: GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE F*CK HAPPENED LAST NIGHT?!!!!! ---everyone stays quiet-- David: Scott..you swore.. Scott: GOOD GOD NO!!!! >"TAILS YA FRICKIN IDIOT STOP THROWING THOSE AT MY HEAD, >WHAT ARE YA AIMING FOR IT OR SOMETHING?" yelled Bob >"Yeah" said Tails >"Why ya little" said Bob Austin: hehe heh.. Tails' is gonna die Scott:>{{{{{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}}}} >Knotohole Villige >Bob is leaving the freedom fighters >" I must leave now" said bob >"Will we see you again?" said Tails >"I focking hope not" said Bob David: Ok, to Mach, yes I think he is doing this on purpose >Then he left and Sonic and Tails went to watch TV. >"Well now the TV stations back up and we won't have to >watch Robot Melrose Place anymore" said SOnic Jamie: thats disgusting... Jose Solano Newsgroups: alt.fan.sonic-hedgehog From: zuckuss199@aol.com (Zuckuss199) Date: 1998/07/12 Subject: [cheaply MSTed part 2]FANFIC: Sonic Fights Robotnik 3: Too Fast For The Naked Eye Previously: David makes retarded yet sarcastic comments Austin acts like a queer Jamie syas it how it is and Scott wants to know what happened last night between David and Jamie >"Cool, Furry South Park is on" said Tails >"Remember when I was telling you how life was like TV?" >Tails said >"Yep" said Sonic >Geoffrey St. George was standing by the window of the >hut >Tails pulled out a gun and shot geoffrey. Rotor stopped >whatever he was doing and broke down the door of sonic's >hut in emergency. David: I get Deja Vu right now... >"Oh my God! i had to go all the way across >the villiage to get here They Killed >Geoffrey!" said Rotor >"YOU BASTARDS!" said Tails >Furry Stan: Oh my God they Killed kenny the rabbit! >Furry Kyle: You bastards! >"Oh now I get it!" said Sonic David: get what? >THE END >In Robotropolis Robotnik pulled himself out of a pile of >scrap metal >"Woah." said Robotnik "It's a good thing I wasn't really >dead, or I'd be dead now" David: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Austin: What's so funny? >"yes sir, very good sir" said Snivley >"But tommorrow is another day" said Robotnik "Another >chance to kill that hedgehog!" David: Ok, end of the movie. Jamie: That was weird Scott: Ok, so tell em what ahppened last night!! David: Should I? Jamie: nah. Scott: DAMMIT Austin: You swore! Scott: SHUT THE F*CK UP AUSTIN!! Jose Solano